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Top 5 Alternative Christmas Gift Games

Ellie Weston – 3rd Dec 2018

Weird Crushes: British Hunks card game

Fancy a go on Michael's McIntyre? No? How about a ramming from Gordon Ramsay? And don't try to tell us you wouldn't gobble Mick Hucknall if given half the chance.

Everyone has a weird crush, and ol’ Blighty is particularly prolific when it comes to churning out strangely attractive celebrities to fancy. There is not a British person alive who won’t be able to relate to this Top Trumps game - and anyone who’s not paid much attention to the weird and wonderful hunk parade will be able to appreciate some of our more popular exports.

Perfect for: when the more uptight relatives have sidled off into the kitchen to do the dishes or fallen asleep in front of James Bond on the sofa. On the train back home with your siblings. With your senile nan who thinks Jonathan Ross is the Prime Minister.

Dead Celebs

This is a fab one for Christmas day for two reasons, the first one being that it’s a bit like Trivial Pursuit but without the obscure cricket questions or having to go hunting for a missing green bit of the little pie. Less fiddly bits, less fuss, less “On 12th January 1964, which Indian spinner bowled 21 consecutive maiden overs against England at Chennai?”

Second reason: there are three ways to play! Dead Celebs is three games in one. Each deck of cards in the box has a different game - yellow is ‘Who Am I?’, red is ‘Trivia’, and green is ‘Guess Who?’. Fab value for money and a nice way to keep a game interesting year after year.

It’s also super easy and fast to learn how to play, so everyone around your table will be clued up and ready to get their trivia on within a minute or two. Hey, a third reason!

Perfect for: when any little children who won’t stop asking who Bob Marley is are tucked up in front of a Pixar film or too busy playing with their new toys to bother you with questions about Margaret Thatcher.

Santa Banter

You’ve held up five fingers and two thumbs for Seven. You’ve pointed at your open mouth for Jaws. And, if you’re really shameless, you might have even flapped your bent arms like a chicken and run around for Chicken Run. NO MORE.

Upgrade your standard round of charades this year with a brand new crazy rhyming-charade-guessing game - with a Christmas theme! Say hello to Santa Banter.

From the makers of the amazing, famously brilliant Obama Llama, comes this fab festive edition of the bestselling hybrid mega game. Rhyme, act, and guess your way through 180 different prompts, from ‘Ol' Saint Nick is throwing a brick’ to ‘Gingerbread house being eaten by a mouse’. Can you find a way to describe ‘Bethlehem covered in phlegm’ without saying any of those words? Of course you can, especially after half a bottle of bucks fizz.

If you fancy something more perennial but still packed full of crazy charade-y fun, check out the original Obama Llama 2.

Perfect for: when you’ve run out of things to say to your extended family, you’ve torn open all the presents, necked your Christmas dinner, and are just the right level of tipsy

What Do You Meme?

You’ve probably seen this one on Facebook, on one of those little videos. Maybe you even tagged a mate and said “  we need to get this!!” or “this looks so good omg”. Or maybe you’ve never heard of it. Let’s assume you’ve never heard of it.

What Do You Meme is basically Cards Against Humanity, but with memes. Your mission is to pair up the funniest caption with the reaction image. Hilarity ensues, naturally. There are hundreds of cards to go round, so it doesn’t get boring - but if you’re extremely hard to please, you can pick up the Fresh Memes and Basic Bitch expansion packs to add a new edge to your memeing. Great practice for going spontaneously viral on Twitter, you’ll be raking in the interactions in no time.

Perfect for: get the stuffy old people out of the room and divert them to the Queen’s speech, retain any old people who ‘get it’. You don’t have time to have a row over why millennial snowflakes have ruined board games.

Bucket of Doom: Toxic Edition

Got a craving for some dark comedy that the usual assortment of “edgy” alternative games just can't satisfy anymore? Bust this bad boy bucket out and you’ll soon be knee deep in the black humour and lots of laughs.

Prepare to put your catastrophising skills to the test as you’re forced to escape from doom-laden scenarios with completely useless objects - figuratively speaking, of course.

Pick one of the doom cards to find out what horrible situation you've found yourself in - for example, you're doing a poo on a plane when you accidentally hit the flush and a ferocious vacuum starts sucking out your intestines. Then draw 8 'Useless Object' cards to find out what tools you have at your disposal to free yourself from this nightmare scenario. Good luck fending off the murderous u-bend with an electric mobility scooter, a pair of snakeskin trousers, and a jar of eye-wateringly strong pickled onions!

Everyone tells their heroic tale of escape and then you all vote on whose was the best - with a hideous penalty for the poor person with the fewest votes. The toxic canister of Shit-Your-Pants® Forfeit Smell. So disgusting that they registered a trademark for it. Trust us, it’s grim. Even the most tolerant noses in the Firebox office couldn’t handle it, and that’s saying something!

Don’t like the threat of smelling something truly heinous? That’s fair. Check out the original Bucket of Doom for a version that will spare the unlucky loser a Christmas day chunder.

Perfect for: when you just happen to have a peg on your nose, just in case.

Jizz: The Game

Only joking, save this one for a hen do or something. Not sure anyone wants to witness their nan’s handjob technique.

Perfect for: making everyone feel very uncomfortable indeed.

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Not found the perfect replacement for Monopoly in this list? Don’t worry, we’ve got dozens of other amazing games here. If you don’t find what you’re after, we’ll eat our little silver hat.