Don't forget your face mask!
Penis Hot Water Bottle
  • Penis Hot Water Bottle
  • Penis Hot Water Bottle
  • Penis Hot Water Bottle

Penis Hot Water Bottle

The meat that heats



Currently out of stock

Notify me when back in stock

Added to basket!

Penis Hot Water Bottle
We can wrap this. Select at basket.
Love it as much as we do?
  • The naughtiest way to keep warm
  • Stay warm even in the most frigid of temperatures
  • Perfect for spooning or tucking down your pants
  • An ironic way to soothe period cramps
  • No boyfriend? No problem


Chilly at night? Not got a hunk to keep your bed warm? We feel ya. Shiver no more, frigid friend. This hot water bottle will keep you willy toasty even in the coldest of temperatures.

He’s no use when he’s all floppy, so fill him up with hot water before getting tucked up. Pro-tip: Tuck him down your pants to experience the thrill of having your very own obscenely large, hot dick.

He’s not just for show, it turns out the humble penis is the perfect shape for a hot water bottle, distributing that lovely warmth sideways through the balls and lengthwise through the shaft. Mmm, cosy.

Just try to ignore his weird little face and be thankful that real penises don’t have them. Mind you, if you were with a man who had a schlong that big, its little grin would be the least of your problems...

More detail and specification

3 Reviews

Average 4.5/5 stars
  • "Exactly what it says on the tin, bought for the Hen as a bit of a giggle and to keep her warm on cold nights when her new hubby is away!"
    - 19th of December, 2019
  • "Good size was bigger than expected "
    - 15th of August, 2019
  • "What's not to love - it's a hot water bottle shaped like a penis and guaranteed to bring a smile to your face on a very cold night!"
    - 8th of August, 2019