Molten Carbonite + Tibana Gas = Wake up in the future... far far away!
Prepare to be utterly gobsmacked…no, prepare to accidentally squish your popped-out eyeballs as you scrabble around looking for the remnants of your shattered jaw whilst wincing at your soiled-in-shock pants. Why? Because the DIY Carbon Freezing Kit
is without doubt the most impressive (not to mention expensive) item ever to grace our pages.
Developed by the spamheads behind the Large Hadron Collider, this amazing chamber allows you to cryogenically freeze yourself for 5-30 years
. Yes, really! Making a complete Han Solo of yourself has never been easier. Or possible.
In order to use this highly sophisticated chamber you’ll need to undergo various suitability tests at CERN
on the Franc-Swiss border. Assuming you cut the mustard your DIY Carbon Freezing Kit will be delivered to your door within two weeks. The freezing process itself is simple: just remove your clothes, lie down in the chamber, set the timer and…well, the next thing you know it’ll be 2040. Don’t forget your toothbrush!