I Rub My Duckie

While languishing in the bath, there are a number of different items that'll make your stay infinitely more pleasurable than a touch of Radox and a few bath salts. There's the loofah for one, and a more pleasurable back scratching device hasn't been invented. There's also the rubber duck, essential for any aquatic recreation, although seldom seen at the municipal swimming baths for obvious reasons. The duck is an icon of water-based serenity. A beacon in the fog of a steaming hot tub. A little yellow rubber thing that floats in your bath.

Or at least it was until the arrival of I Rub My Duckie (Paris), the rubber duck with a secret weapon beneath the hood. Dubbed a personal massager, the Prozac-faced pink peril houses a powerful motor that provides the user with an unlimited (well, two AA batteries kind of unlimited) source of soothing, vibrating enjoyment. This banana boat of oscillating leisure is fully waterproof and rather than exposing sensitive electronics to that most efficient of conductors, water, this quackers little toy is turned on and off by squeezing his back, operating a switch firmly tucked inside his rubbery torso. This bright pink duck also comes with a removeable feather boa and blinging Swarovski crystal on its beak.

Not only is I Rub My Duckie's electrical motor immune to watery seepage, it's also very quiet indeed, so there'll be no tell-tale buzzing emanating from the bathroom as you frolic naked with your duck, thus eliminating potentially embarrassing enquiries from housemates. All that stands between you and hours of watery fun with your very own duck is a simple phone call. You know it makes sense.