ONEDOF Turntable

It’s a medical fact that your ears become more discerning when you’re filthy rich. Okay, it isn’t but you’ll feel as if they have once you’ve listened to the incredible ONEDOF Turntable. People, prepare for sonic nirvana.

Short for One Degree of Freedom, the ONEDOF is the ultimate precision turntable for vinyl loving audiophiles with bulging wallets. The brainchild of NASA award-winning engineer Aleks Bakman, it’s a gilded masterpiece of retro-modern design. Moreover it sounds awesome, even if you’re listening to H from Steps comeback album – which is unlikely ‘cos it’s unavailable on vinyl. Or anything else.

So what’s all the hoohaa? Well this true heavyweight (literally – it weighs 110lbs!!) is the first turntable in the history of the phonograph to feature a self-centering aluminum alloy sound-dampening platter with non-resonant liquid suspension. Which in non-technobabble means it wipes out virtually all acoustic distortion, making vinyl records sound amazingly crisp and clear. Cylindrical bearings? Pah!

Extraordinarily precise, the ONEDOF’s microprocessor-controlled noise-cancelling brushless drive adjusts its vertical motor position on the fly to cancel out resonances in its three drive belts. Using similar technology to noise-cancelling headphones it generates a counterphase signal to block out unwelcome sonic impurities. What’s more its tonearm tower works with any tonearm/cartridge combination and provides continuous vertical tracking angle adjustment over three inches, and can support up to three tonearms.

Whatever. All we know is that Led Zeppelin II sounds flippin’ awesome on this baby. Plus it looks like something from H.G. Wells’ study. Of course the major bummer here is that the ONEDOF costs $150,000. And that’s a lot of dosh to fork out if you’re gonna play ‘Now That’s What I call Westlife 6’ till the needle falls off. But you’re not are you? No, if you’re thinking about forking out on this stunning beauty you’ve probably got a vinyl collection worth shouting about. ‘Yay, put on the 12” of Never Gonna Give You Up!’