Project Utopia

Barbara Bach not included

764

Project Utopia

Barbara Bach not included

8,926 586 393

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Your own floating island!

Before we begin it’s worth pointing out that this product will set you back several hundred million, minimum. Still reading? Good. Now that we’ve got rid of all the rubbernecking paupers we can elaborate because Project Utopia deserves your full attention, unencumbered by thoughts of ogling millionaires; this baby is strictly for billionaires and beyond.

You see in order to showcase their astounding capabilities, our good friends at Yacht Island Design and BMT Nigel Gee have set about developing several concept proposals, the most bonkers of which is the breathtakingly awesome Project Utopia. No, this isn’t a joke.

One of those thrusters

Measuring 100m in length and breadth, and spanning over 11 luxed-out decks, there is enough room on Project Utopia to create an entire micro-nation. It’s ideal for ocean-going megalomaniacs bent on world domination. And you needn’t worry about puking on your Nehru jacket because this floating behemoth is designed for minimum motion, even in the most extreme sea conditions.

Each ‘leg’ supports a fully azimuthing (no idea, even after Googling) thruster, so Project Utopia can move between various locations at slow speeds. ‘You must’ve been seeing things Billy. Now eat your ice cream and shut up!’

Lounge by the pool... in the sea

A large central structure bisects the water’s surface, acting as a conduit for the mooring system, which houses a wet dock for access by smaller supply boats/British agents looking for trouble. There are also several helicopter pads so you can make your escape if your crew turns mutinous. ‘Oh really, 007!’

We could go on. So we will. A retractable canopy covers the uppermost deck and on the “13th Floor” there is an observatory with 360-degree views, at which point guests will be 65m above the water’s surface. ‘You know this organisation does not tolerate failure…’

Project Utopia

Impressed? You won’t be. You’ll be utterly blown away because Project Utopia beggars belief. But we’ll have no talk of beggars round here, thank you very much. Lend us £100 million. No? Bon voyage then.

Product Features:

Accommodates 70 crew and can cater for 16 guests
Maximum speed of 15 knots
Diesel electric propulsion
There are four major spaces which make up the external deck and communal areas: 'Casino Square', 'Loews Hotel', 'The Oasis', and 'The Grand Atrium'.
Two large tender garages to store all manner of launches, offshore power boats, jet skis etc
Dive dock and Submarine, deployed from one of the submerged hulls
Multi configurable sports court sized to championship tennis regulations also doubles as a Heli-Pad
Ample crew quarters including a gym and private sun terrace

Dimensions:

Measures approximately 100m(Ø)

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Customer Reviews

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Does it come with the submarine or do I need to buy that separately? It's the hidden extras that make things like this pricey.
Simon, Glasgow, Scotland - 3rd March 2013

Firebox says: I'm sure we could reach an agreement Simon, anyone with the capital to buy Project Utopia is a friend of ours!

I brought one for my friends birthday. They Liked it so I brought it. It is nice and I'm thinking of starting my own micro-nation. Oh yeah an my pal Bill Gates has one. We pretend to be pirates and fire water cannons at each others ship. I recommend it. It's cheap and value for money.
Dominic Brett, The Atlantic Ocean - 10th February 2013

I would like to express my concern at the quality of the workmanship of the utopia project. The designers completely overlooked any effective systems protecting against maverick british agents. This resulted in not complete failure and destruction of said property, but also killed my husband Karl. With that in mind I would like to claim a full refund-I appreciate that it may not fall within the distance selling guidelines. I am fully confident that a reputable organisation like yourself would be happy to come to an agreement. To sweeten the deal I would like to offer two submarines as a gesture of goodwill (slightly used). I look forward to your response.
K.Stromberg, Bahamas - 21st January 2013

Hi, I am considering spending all my funding (For the next three years) on this, so I have a few questions: 1. ) Does it have cat-flaps? Captain Kibbles needs his fresh air. 2. ) Legality issues. Am I allowed to park it in any sea, or do I need to ask the UN for permission? 3. ) Henchmen? Or do I have to buy them separately? Oh, and one last thing: 4. ) Does it come with wi-fi? Should these be answered I shall avoid destroying you when I take over the Earth.
Doctor 'Not Mad', Flim Island, Off The Coast Of Valencia - 19th January 2013

Firebox says: Hey Doctor "Not mad" 1)We can fit the Cat-Flaps if so desired, how big is Captain Kibbles? We can also fit an automatic stroking device for when your arms get tired from all that maniacal stroking. 2)The good thing about this island is it moves! Perfect for when trying to get away from Hans Blix when he comes knocking! 3)We don't do henchmen. I'm afraid you'll have to source them yourself. We are more than willing to throw in a couple of sharks with frickin laserbeams though. 4)This comes with Tim Berners-Lee as a hostage so Wifi and the Internet should not be a problem! Remember us in you quest for world domination.

How much would this actually cost?
, - 9th January 2013

Firebox says: About £200,000,000

If you find 85 other people to live on one of these, to run it, staff it and work as community, I will happily join as the 86th person. With rising tides, we may have to start investing ;).
Luke, Isle Of Man - 8th January 2013