Hanging Alarm Clock

The trouble with most alarm clocks is that they allow you to snuggle back to bobo-land the second you switch them off. And that just won't do, especially when there are important things to do like gawp at gizmos on our gorgeously orangey website. Enter (cue someone shouting 'shut up you pesky little...') the irksomely ingenious Hanging Alarm Clock.

As you can see, this devious little orb dangles from the ceiling via its own cable. So far, so what? Well, it remains within reach until its wailing alarm goes off, at which point it automatically creeps 30cm up its cable. Reel-y annoying! To put it into snooze mode and stop it climbing higher, just give it a wallop. After five minutes of inactivity the whole wailing/climbing business begins again. Ignore it and you'll you have no choice but to stand up and switch it off. You'll be hitting the roof. Almost. The only way to end your misery is to press the stop button.

To add to the fun, the alarm sound is not just a simple buzz or beep but a loud ticking noise accompanied by a wailing siren and flashing white light. You'll love it...we mean you'll hate it. Actually we don't know what we mean because this nifty gizmo is so maddening you might start wondering if it's possible to fit two full size pillows in your lugholes.

Short of getting your butler to stand by the bed and dangle an alarm clock from a fishing line, we can think of no better way to ensure you wake up and stay up every morning. In fact we've issued complimentary Hanging Alarm Clocks to all staff members and punctuality is now running at 100%. It's the gift that keeps on giving.


Indeed the thought of all you sleepy heads reaching up and slapping this infuriatingly effective alarm clock in your jimmy-jammas or birthday suits is already amusing us no end. So don't be late, get ordering.