10th Feb 2012

Orgasmatron

Not at all what it sounds like

Customer rating:
4.33 from
355 ratings

Sorry, this product is not available.


We come across all kinds of things during the noble pursuit of 'product development'. Much of it is nonsense, discarded after five minutes either because it breaks or because what it claims to do is actually a Trades Description Act-infringingly million miles away from what it actually does. And being honest, we thought that the Orgasmatron would end up on the discard heap.

Which only goes to prove how wrong you can be. Obviously, the sleazy name was seriously off-putting in the first instance, but once the Orgasmatron had worked its magic on our collective heads, all was forgiven. Its eight, round-ended copper arms certainly seem to work magic once they're lowered onto your scalp and then gently worked around the back of your head and neck. Get someone else to do it to you, since that - as is the case with lots of things - is the best way.

The effect is tremendous - it sets off waves of the deeply pleasant shivering sensation you get when 'someone walks over your grave' (you know, the random shake that can strike at any time). Only here it's prolonged and extremely relaxing. It won't actually result in any climactic activity, but you can clearly see exactly where the makers were coming from (fnar fnar) when they named this unique and very satisfying massage implement. Recommended strongly - one kept in the top drawer for a bit of afternoon delight in the office.

more infoMore Info

Please Note:
  • Product handle might vary slightly in colour
  • Head massage is good for relieving tension and for stimulating the brain. So keep the Orgasmatron in the vicinity of your head - however your urges may tempt you.

videosVideos

Sorry, to watch our videos you'll need to upgrade to a newer version of Flash. Upgrade now!

Rating:
Views: 10452

Monkey & Orgasmatron :-)
Andrew Downie, Swansea - 27th May 2003

Video URL: http://www.firebox.com/video/548




Win with fireboxWin with Firebox
If we spot a video we think is AMAZING we will give away a FREE £50.00 Firebox Voucher to the sender! Upload your video now for a chance to win!

photosPhotos

Customer image
enlarge
Jonathan Hunt, Northampton
Customer image
enlarge
Ad van veen, Boskoop, The Netherlands
Customer image
enlarge
Nicola Brown, London
 
Win with fireboxWin with Firebox
If we spot a photo we think is AMAZING we will give away a FREE £50.00 Firebox Voucher to the sender! Upload your photo now for a chance to win!

reviewsComments

reviewsReviews and FAQs

Press Reviews...

press review "Produces a heavenly, tingling sensation that relaxes your whole body."
The Guardian - Jul '08
press review "Just lower it eight round-ended copper arms onto your scalp and wait for them to work their magic. As you gently swirl it around the back of your head and neck, it sets off waves of oh-so tingly sensations."
Cosmopolitan - Feb '03

Visitor Reviews...

Page: 1 | 2 | 3 | 4 | 5
visitor avatar Well, I was telling my Dad about this product, and as I was saying the word (for the first time aloud) I thought: what the hell am I saying?? I got so embarrassed. I don't think my Dad realised it wasn't a sex toy so I just hope he's forgotten the whole thing! It's really relaxing though, but I think it deserves a better name.
Anna, London - 22nd December 2005
visitor avatar Whoever reviewed the Orgasmatron from Firebox was defintely not a girl! THe name might be sleazy, but it is definitely not wrong!! The Orgasmatron is capable of sending down hundreds of Orgasmic shivers down your spine. Girls, get your man to try it on you, Men - you'll thank me for this tip. Try it!
Asima, Oxford - 19th December 2003
visitor avatar Save your money and make your own out of wire coathangers!
Paul Ponting, Ormskirk - 23rd August 2003
visitor avatar It is awesome. Its such a soothing feeling when it first touches your head. It truly is amazing!
Reuben, California, USA - 14th July 2003
visitor avatar This is amazing! I love it, my housemates love it, but telling girls to come home and try my Orgasmatron is still fraut with danger!
Jimbo Smith, Salisbury, Wilts - 24th March 2003
visitor avatar This felt so good! I'm keeping mine for myself, but am definitely buying one for my mum - she needs to relax and wind down and this definately does the trick! Thanks for helping me find it lycos!
Gemma, Bath - 9th November 2002
visitor avatar Help! Initially attracted by the name, I've since come to accept that no pornography at all is associated with this product. A bitter disappointment, then.
Dave Nomorals, Manchester - 12th August 2002
visitor avatar Chillin at Mass Dosage's crib always meant something different. The Orgasmatron had us all crooning even though we new it had been on Dave's skanky pip. Luckily the Rood Rat Bastard is still around making it available to whomever needs it. Big up!
Blignort, Johannesburg - 25th July 2002
visitor avatar My mate just bought one. His text message said... "When it came, so did I. It's wicked"!!
Jonathan, Lincoln - 15th July 2002
visitor avatar She was excited aand surprised. What more can a man ask for?
David Newlands, - 18th June 2002
Wild Hibiscus Flowers

Wild Hibiscus Flowers

from £10.99
Love Tokens

Love Tokens

£10.99
Nookii

Nookii

£26.49
Categories
Explore
Browse By Price

Twitter

  • Suddenly we feel very very very very very very very small - http://t.co/N6cSDtwQ
  • Let Firebox solve your #ValentinesDay gift worries. Tell us who you need to buy for and we’ll suggest a winning product! #VDaySOS
  • Great photo of our box. Yep, a box. But this one has exciting words on it! http://t.co/EFAKz8SS
  • It's this little nippers birthday. You'll never guess from his headwear or his chubby little face what he loves! http://t.co/rZjceC91
  • Our Spidey senses are tingling (we really should go to the doctors). New Spiderman trailer looks cooool http://t.co/xuP3y8Wj

Follow @firebox on twitter...