Legal Coke High!

Friday 9th August 2013

Heading out for the night, but feeling tired from the daily grind? Need a little coke pick-me-up? We hear you. 

You probably shouldn't do it all yourself mind. Let everyone have a bump. Share. Chop it up and lay it on the coffee table for friends (or let a dwarf carry it around in a bowl on his/her head if you're feeling debauched). At 32p a gram you can afford to play Joe F**king Hollywood until the wheels fall off. 

Unload this premium cola on your guests and we guarantee everyone will be yammering away until the early hours. Really excitedly. Usually about how great they are. 

Be warned though, that high won't last forever and the comedown could be pretty brutal. Try and remember that no one feeling lasts forever. It will pass. Try and remember the good times were worth it. 

Once you're hooked, we promise not to raise the price or dilute the purity. £12.99 for 420g. You're robbing us!

The Firebox Blog: Not as funny as we hoped...

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