Think of beer guts and you typically think of boozy blokes exposing their builder's cleavage as they lean over to pick up another pork scratching. But you won't once you see the amazing Beerbelly® in action. Because although this ingenious device looks just like a spare tyre when worn under clothing, it's actually a hi-tech stealth beer dispenser.
Made up of an insulated neoprene sling and a polyurethane bladder connected to a drinking tube, the Beerbelly® holds up to 2.3 Litres (over four pints) of amber nectar and it will stay cold for hours with the optional freezer pack. Brilliant, eh? Okay, so you'll look a bit podgy when wearing it, but who gives a XXXX when you can surreptitiously swig your favourite brew wherever you may roam.
Just think of the possibilities: no more queuing up and forking out on overpriced drinks at festivals, gigs and games. Why, the savings you'll make at just one event will pay for your Beerbelly® and still leave you with enough change to buy some nuts. Probably. You can even go jogging, skiing and hiking wearing your Beerbelly® (but perhaps it'd be best to fill it with water, not beer).
This really is one of the greatest booze-related inventions we've ever seen. Indeed, the only downside is that you'll resemble one of Gazza's mates from the chest down - surely a small price to pay when you can secretly glug beer whenever and wherever you fancy. And if anyone questions your new gut you can use one of our pre-prepared responses:
- 'I'm in a Bad Manners tribute band and we're on in five.'
- 'This is a medical device. Wanna see where the tube leads?'
- 'Stand back
I'm with CTU and this is stealth body armour.'
- 'My catheter runneth over.'
- 'Fancy a beer?'
As you can imagine, the Beerbelly® is going to fly off the shelves faster than you can say 'I hope that's lager you're drinking' so we suggest you hit Add to Cart before we call last orders on this utterly brilliant boozing accessory. 'Urp!