If you're finding that your table is periodically covered with ring marks left by unstable and volatile drinkers, then it's about time you laid down the Radioactive Elements Glowing Coaster Set.
Including Radium, Plutonium, Uranium and Thorium; just sit your drinks upon these pressure-sensitive pads and they light up, emitting a soothing radioactive glow. Not only do they illuminate your drinks, but you can also frantically tap them to draw the party host's attention to your depleted alcoholic reserves.
For the Chemistry buffs out there, each of the (irr)radiant elements in the set is labelled with the number representing its most stable or common isotope. And if that last sentence didn't interest you in the slightest, then you can always pretend that the coasters are a completely unresponsive yet still very rewarding game of Simon Says.